to compare to this one from post grad forum 12th june 08;
reflections on these;
- scene set with the objects laid out more in post grad version. i tried to hold back on this in the scratch- putting out the table cloth etc sets a nostalgic/old lady scene immediately, and i wanted to try to centre the attention on visualising from my verbal storytelling, that the objects i produce from the suitcase are there to erase the image. doug thought that the objects should be brought out during. i'm unsure- the thing that came up with the nunnery was watching the image and watching me when happened at same time. try out the post grad forum way in scratch two
- the story was too much like a performative monologue- needs to be more conversational and natural more like the post grad forum, but sharper, shorter? script it?
- too much borrowed from stand up in scratch one-tone it down, more down the pub conversation
- liked the amber lighting although need portable light as mrpoe shed technology
- doug felt the photography was getting lost in the performance- however on reflection i disagree as part two flower stories it is at the heart of the performance, however story could emphasise more on the photography side in it- shed camera obscura
- monty python did a sketch with sheds- maybe look at this if interested in developing the humour side
- use more shed technolgy eg homemade speakers to amplify sound in the shed from when i'm outside
- maybe break up the story going outside shed mid way? possibly too much talking at the audience?
Ok- so things to try out;
- Less performative self-script the story and edit it more
- Investigate shed technology for sound and try out
- More relationship between inside and outside the shed with the story- poss try out granddad story entirely from outside?
- Tighten up the instructions to participants if they are to control the mirror etc
- need to make a better makeshift smaller shed for demo purpose of intentions- cardboard?
- layout of 6 x 4 foot shed
- more blackout
- test garden spray bottle (shed technology) and timings
- make a makeshift little garden for flowers for people to pick outside the shed
- consider my role in this- facilitator, how to start and lead the stories?